Monday, November 30, 2009

Omg I think I've gone and actually made it modular!

Each door unit is free standing, front deck and stairs are each a separate unit which attaches to front door unit, back will be different but utilize a similar system, and tubes will be a tension mount system. Thus making each unit chica moveable (in theory)
Will harvest used wood for flooring and just lay in place. Almost time to start sewing. Oh yeah!! Truly a woman and her work in preparation for women and their work art space (opening Austin March 6th). Think snoopy dancing on roof of his dog house.

Sunday, November 29, 2009

Neither hears nor understands

I listen as I hear each of our distortions and misunderstandings and misinterpretations as they are exasperated by intermediaries, hurt feelings, histories and anger. And as I make stairs that descend from my own history for my upcoming show, treading where no one hears the echoes of her foot falL, I see that i hear not his foot fall's echoes as well. Neither understands because neither walks within the history and experience of the other, neither sees from the others vantage point, neither can.

Friday, November 27, 2009

Oops. It lists to the right

Good thing I am not an engineer or architect and that I make gnarly art, so in the end the list will simply become a part of the piece. I suppose it is fitting since I naturally seem to list a little more to the right then the left.

"we bring our lares with us"

"we bring our lares with us" - Louise Bourgeois

Well...of course, how could it be otherwise. Not a new thought, but always jumps off the page at me no matter the author.

Louise just past mid-ninety and still making art, yes, that is my goal, what I feel compelled toward, feel called to step into. And so I move forward bringing with me all that I am and no more.

Thursday, November 26, 2009

Standing at the "fence edge of a religious petting zoo"

I am yanking this quote a bit out of context, but would like to unpack it because I can feel the trickle of truth in it.

"Are you doing justice to the __, or just creating a petting zoo for religious __" Greg Wolfe, 1994

Specifically he is talking about the arts harvested and embedded in Art, faith, mystery -- Image, a visual arts and literary journal and wondering if he's just created a petting zoo for religious artists.

What strikes me about this is it's cross applicablity to all areas of calling.

How does this apply to me?

Do I have an expectation for others to create a religious petting zoo for my comfort--with Music? Community? Books? Church programming?

Do I cater to others needs for pretty comforts that numb them to their own callings that require courage, neutering and numbing even the calling on my own life?

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

Not sure but in process

in I breathe

Good news though is the piece rolls and will fit through double doors. In theory, no lifting.

Wooden discs are about 5' in diameter and distance between the two discs is 36" (and women and their works back door is 41" in theory this will roll into the gallery in March 2010).Needs serious refinement

in I breathe

What is it that I have
That I was not given

Even the air
I did not make it
I did nothing to deserve it
I did not cultivate it
It was just given
Ready for my harvesting

In I breathe

What of grief
Even that bears witness to gift
The gift of connection
Enflamed with ache
Because it exists
In the field of my heart

In I breathe
With ragged gasps
The gift

Sunday, November 22, 2009

He is so arrogant and brazen

As he explored a scant distance from where I propped my feet. I know he exists and don't mind the cohabitation so long as he stays hidden away, but when he scurries in his arrogance with his brazen mindset, in the broad daylight, his furry little ass across the floor in such close proximity to where I lay my head in slumber, he must die!!!! Armed with a fresh set of glue traps and poison, I will end this before the day is through!!!

I am pretty sure sleep will elude me this very eve!

Gosh dang mouse!

Friday, November 20, 2009

How do I de-construct another?

"when we are prejudice against another, we can reduce the other to something non-human. If we truly saw each other as human beings all created in God's image, it would be hard to be so destructive toward each other." -Marsha Mirkin, PHD

Who do I dehumanize? Who do I destruct? Who do I de-construct? And as I open my eyes to my actions, will I be too ashamed to change? Too angry to change? Or will I hope enough in light and goodness to change and value?

Will I begin changing my actions to humanize and honor another as being of value and infinite worth?

Will I harden myself, ploughing on, and solidify my rationale?

What are the ramifications to the other, to those who stand in proximity, to myself, to the trickel into the present, into the future?

Will I construct and build?
Will I de-construct and destroy?

Thursday, November 19, 2009

students working ghost drawings

Melissa L drawing Melissa

Melissa L drawing Melissa

Melissa L drawing Melissa

Rachel drawing Rachel

Rachel drawing Rachel

Tuesday, November 17, 2009

More student explorations in self and classmate portraits

the ghosting technique is extremely helpful in helping the student find their subject. note melissa's early drawing and then were it is an hour and a half later.

melissa l of melissa v, early in the afternoon

melissa l of melissa v, late afternoon

Monday, November 16, 2009

Contemplating exhibition elements for UTSA GALLERY

Re-purposing 8' diameter megaphone-like structures with additional elements to appear to be squishing out of ceiling and wall.

there is a 14" gap at the top of the wall that leads into an adjacent gallery space, the units will appear to be oozing through this gap and be in both spaces.

Officially deinstalled

Saturday, November 14, 2009

Yes. I believe this is so

"Why God chooses to answer some prayers and not others, I do not know. All I know for certain is that it's always right to ask."

A quote from a quote off a friend's blog.

and it's wake pushes forward into the future with ferocity

hurt begets hurt
which in turn begets


which ripples
linearly and laterally
with a ferocious push out
into the future through
generations, through lifetimes,
through what is forgotten and
yet to be known
clinging to each swell

blame is a fruitless fathoming
leaving the heart empty
in cold abandoned tatters
adrift, unrescued

the only thing that impedes the push
is, as one is able,
to navigate one's own actions and heart,
bestowing acts of mercy and forgiveness*
both inward and outward

all else accelerates the linear and lateral
waves of harm that emanate
as through a portal from each of us.


*bestowing acts of mercy and forgiveness
casts ripples that not only impede those of harm
but redirect them for good

am collecting old belts; will take your old ones off your hands

if you've got some belts you want to dispose of, i'll take them and embed them in an upcoming piece of art i am making.

Drop 'em by my studio at BOX 13 ArtSpace (6700 Harrisburg 77011) or if you see my truck toss them in the back.

Friday, November 13, 2009

"You can never go wrong stopping by an opening party at this scrappy East End artist-run space. "

Box 13 Artspace: The latest round of exhibits kicks off from 7-9:30 p.m. Saturday at 6700 Harrisburg.
Weekend events provide options for arts lovers
By DOUGLAS BRITT Copyright 2009 Houston Chronicle

Hope to see you guys at the BOX
Saturday, November 14
7-9:30 pm
6700 Harrisburg Blvd (77011)
Parking on Cesar Chavez and Capitol

Hasta La Basura Se Separa [artcrush] is an exhibition curated by the Austin-based group Los Outsiders: Salvador Castillo, Michael Anthony García and Hector Hernandez. Originally presented at the Galleria del Espacio Cultural de la Antigua Aduana in the border town of Nuevo Laredo, Tamaulipas, Mexico, Hasta La Basura Se Separa [artcrush] features the work of 13 contemporary artists from Texas, New York & Utah.

And i would be one of the artists, so come on out this Saturday.

How can my false self lead me to the real Light?


There is a darkness that we are all led into by our own stupidity, by our own selfishness, blindness, or by just living out of the false self. And there is a darkness that I believe God leads us through for our own enlightenment. In both cases, we have to walk through these dark periods by brutal honesty, confessions, surrenders, letting go, forgiveness, and often by some necessary restitution, apology or healing ritual. I still hear of Vietnam vets who feel they must go back to Vietnam and help some Vietnamese children to be healed.

Different vocabularies would have called these acts of repentance, penance, mortification, dying to self, or ego stripping. By any account it is major surgery and surely feels like dying (although it also feels like immense liberation). We need help and comfort during these times. We must let ourselves be led by God and also by others. But how can we know the light if we’ve never walked through the darkness?

Taken from Hope Against Darkness, pp. 165, 173

Current Mantra:
Lord, teach me to choose life

Thoughts from Fr. Richard Rohr, Fall 2009

Meditations from Richard Rohr
Of Center for Action and Contemplation

Wednesday, November 11, 2009


I beat my head on the same wall
still believing that goodness
is more real than malice
more real than historical hurts
more real than secret shadows

i choose to believe
goodness and mercy reside there
as well, in these hiding places

I work to look past the visible;
I continue to move toward walking and gifting
mercy, goodness and forgiveness

So I focus on opening and listening

and what i hear:
it is time, kathy, to gently stand up
stand up, kathy

and i will
as gently as i can
in spite of what i see

Friday, November 06, 2009

How do my emotions help me to understand more deeply?

We must go through the stages of feeling, not only in the last death of anything but all the earlier little deaths. If we abort these emotional stages by easy answers, all they do is take a deeper form of disguise and come out in another way. So many people learn that the hard way—by getting ulcers, by all kinds of psycho-somatic diseases, depression, chronic irritability, and misdirected anger—because they refuse to let their emotions run their course, honor them consciously, or find some appropriate place to share them.

Emotions are not right or wrong, good or bad. They are merely indicators of what is happening, and must be listened to, usually in the body. People who do not feel deeply finally do not know or love deeply either. It is the price we pay for loving. Like Job we must be willing to feel our emotions and come to grips with the mystery in our head, our heart, and our body. To be honest, that takes years.

From Job and the Mystery of Suffering: Spiritual Reflections, pp.54-55
Richard Rohr