reaping

it is my second fall here in my microcosm, but my first with this red fruitition. perhaps the extensive drought of the past season left it dormant, but this early eve I arrived at the hermitage and pop, here it is. a lushness of vivid eye pleasing surprise and a reminder that we don't always reap what we sow. most often we reap from histories of a space and the heritage of others as they overlap with our lives. we reap from these histories both good and bad. with the unit, even prior to knotting, I had already begun to reap from his familial female relational ancestries. I was seen through an ancient family lens passed down from initial contact of our overlap, I reaped what I did not sow for a very long time. naturally there is a vice versa as it is never a one way reaping. so often we must be wary of the reaping and reaper as they may not be causal manifestations of our own actions but have trickled forward from long forgotten pasts. holding all gently, knowing though I may have worked for it, have talent for it I still stand on the reapings of what came before. in my family, the women acquired college educations at least 5 generations back. I reaped a cultural placement to succeed academically, yet I did not sow. I reaped a genetic phenotype, I did not sow. I reaped the breath that fills and drives my bodily systems, I did not sow. much of our reapings we like to claim or blame in great arrogance not grasping with knowing the complexities from which it came. I simple know I did not plant this land. I reap.

I have experienced most reapings as comminglings of present and direct sowing with that not our own.